An Explanation

I apologize that I have not been good at posting this summer.  Partly this is because I have been busy, but partly it is because I have not been happy.  Although we have had happy stuff go on and I continue to see beautiful things every day that I am grateful for, it is hard to sugar-coat things when it is not all light and rainbows.  I normally enjoy blogging, but having to think so hard about how to make things sound like I'm not complaining all the time makes it less enjoyable, and so I have avoided it.

We have done some other fun things since vacation.  L and I went to the Fair.

The girls and I went to the zoo.

We went down south for a weekend so I could go to one of my college friend's 50th birthday party - it was a lot of fun.

The garden continues to produce.  We are now getting corn in addition to what is pictured below.  I have also been avoiding the garden at times, because what it produces best and in abundance is weeds.  An overwhelming amount of weeds.  So many weeds that when I spend 2 hours pulling them, there are STILL an amazing amount of weeds, AND when I go back in a few days, they are back where I just pulled.  It's relentless, it's discouraging, it makes me feel like a failure.

2 weeks ago, J decided to FINALLY move in to a room of her own.  We have been advising this to the girls for a couple of years, but they have been resistant.  Since J decided first, she got to choose which room she wanted, which caused regrets by L (who finally seems to be coming to terms with it.)  The past 2 weeks have been filled with sorting through mountains of stuff collected over the past 10 years.  A lot has gone in the trash, a lot has gone to Goodwill, and some has gone into storage.  This has required a lot of sorting and stashing on my part as well.  Along with cleaning, shopping, moving, and now painting (although J is doing most of that herself.)  We were able to find a desk at the local Habitat Restore for J, as well as a bed on Amazon for much less than I had hoped.  There have been arguments, there have been tears, there has been a ginormous mess, and there has been more STRESS.  It will be good, but I am still waiting to see the light at the end of the tunnel of this project!

My biggest issue this summer, I think, is that I try to keep everyone else happy, which isn't possible, and just makes me feel more stressed and more unhappy.  I also feel very lonely up here on the hill.  The party with my friends in VA for a couple of hours last week is the first time I have spent with anyone besides my family, or at work, or at a Board Meeting for literally months.  I feel overwhelmed with everyone's schedules and the never ending list of things that need to be done.  Everywhere I look around here is a reminder of something else that I have not managed to accomplish.

So...I guess this is a farewell, for now.  I'm sure we will stay busy.  I'm sure there will be photo worthy happenings.  I'm sure we will all be fine.  But I can't do this for the time being.  It makes me feel worse.

Vacation 2019 by the Numbers

Our wonderful family vacation has come and gone, and we are back to the routine of summer...EXCEPT L has started back with soccer practice this week (2 nights/week.)

We spent another week up in Erie the end of July.  After 2 summers of going up in June and being unable to go in the water due to it being excessively cold, we decided to go a month later, which was a good choice.  We also decided to take our dog, Stella, along this year.  She has been notorious for being extremely carsick, so we have been taking her on short car trips all year long to help prepare her.  We also dosed her liberally with Dramamine.  She travelled well, but was so anxious the entire time we were there, that I don't think we'll be doing that again.

The weather was lovely for most of the week.  There were 2 mornings of clouds and rain, during which we visited The Tom Ridge Environmental Center/Museum and watched a big screen movie about volcanoes one day, and chilled at the house watching movies on the other day.

The girls and I also took a couple of long bike rides - one day we rode over 7 miles and met JP at one of the beaches, where we hung out for awhile.  Another day, we rode around the entire peninsula of Presque Isle (over 13 miles) and met JP at a diner for lunch.

Even Stella got to go to Presque Isle, we walked with her on the trail there too.  We declined to take her on the beach, though, as we were concerned that her Velcro like poodle hair would collect too much sand.

We walked up 78 narrow stairs to the top of Presque Isle Light House on one day, and up 132 steps in the Tom Ridge Environmental Center look out on another.

We played some games, watched some movies, ate a lot of good take out, and enjoyed just relaxing.

Unfortunately, I managed to fall down the stairs at our house on the first day, and to fall off my bike on the 3rd day, so I am still healing from 2 giant bruises on my left thigh.  Luckily all my bones are still intact.

As enjoyable as our vacation was, it is good to be home.  We harvested all of the hens, with my parents help, on the day before we left on vacation, so there have been fewer chores and more quiet on our hill since we've been home.

Now it is time to gear up towards the start of school, although it is still a couple of weeks off.  We have bought school supplies, and I think we are good on school clothes until it starts getting cold.  L's soccer cleats still fit (thank goodness), so we are good on sports equipment as well.

Enjoy the last few sunny days of summer!